serious talk - 8thgen member & suicide

[webby]

Maybe others can help me out with their suggestions and comments. The member may even see this thread as to why he/she shouldn't. I know of at least one member who lost a family member to suicide so maybe you can express your feelings in this thread. Please do not joke in this thread or turn it into something off topic. I have no contact info or address for this person, so I can't do much about "calling for help". They feel like their life is too stressful and think that they need to take their own life. ...

maybe this will even help others who are feeling the same way..

The only thing I can do at this point is hope they see this thread and continue to talk to them. They feel like they probably wouldn't be noticed - if they'd be gone from here. There is only so much that I can say to convince them that they'd be missed. (I still don't think they believed me) Maybe some others can express how much you'd miss seeing an active member gone from the community. I know some are close enough to one another to feel like brothers/sisters. You may not even know that they may be the one in need here....

[babaki]

nothing is ever worth killing yourself over. theres always a better way out.

[MBK]

just grind it out whoever you are... things will look up for ya

[SiNISTER SiNDY]

It's hard to know what to say right now... Please, whichever user you are, reach out to the friends you've made in your location. Losing a family member is the hardest thing that you can do, but there are ways to overcome it. Make he grief a part of you, but don't let it consume you. Use it to remember your family member, and control it so that you will never forget them.

[shawn-o]

They have to know that theres a HUGE support system there for them no matter what- That being 8thcivic.com. Theres quite afew members in here that i would personally consider part of an extended family. Although i havent been on in awhile- Im definately still reading and checking up.

Hang in there. Youve got a ton of friends whom would do anything for you on here.

[07BlakBlak]

Man.....this is so sad to hear. All I can say is that you have do things for you. Not everyone else. Stress is just that, its just stress. Shake it off. My fiance teaches elementery school and every morning when she gets in she has the kids "shake their sillys out". It gives the kids a moment to isolate their energy and release it. That might sound dumb to an adult but I work in a very high stress, high pace enviroment and somtimes I will basically do the same thing with my stress. Shake it out.

Sometimes that just means standing up and literally shaking it out like your warming up for a basketball game.....sometimes it means going out for lunch by yourself and just enjoying being alone for a moment......occasionally I just tell everyone at work that I need to take off for a while.....and sometimes, I just come on here and vent.

You need to take time to do things for yourself. There are many breathing techniques and relaxation techniques which people teach, but have never been helpful to me. What works best for me is to just isolate the feeling of being stressed and just shake it off.

As far as no one noticing you are gone....do you have a rep bar? If you have ever received rep. I can assure you someone will notice you are gone on the forum. I wont even get into your family....my Aunt was the token "black sheep" of the family and drank herself to death. There hasnt been a Christmas at my grandmothers where she isnt remembered....and it has never been negative. People in for family dont remember your faults, they just remember how much they would give anything....alot of times their own lives to have you back.

[tnel2005]

Never take your life no matter how hard you might think you have it. Just being alive is such a blessing in itself, there are people you know and don't know that would love to help you in anyway possible, just ask and I know you wont be let down.

[Anubis]

My prayers go out to you and your family during the time of healing after a precious life was lost. Try to remain positive, as hard as that is I'm sure, no need to escalate the loss with another. No matter what your life is valuable in many eyes......some of which you may not even know the full extent.

Just remember there is always darkness before the sun rises. Today is what you make it, but tomorrow can be better. You have to believe that............

-best wishes

[sgtpruitt]

Your family and friends need you around. Believe it or not so does the rest of the world. There's so much you can still do in the world. Think of what you haven't accomplished yet. Think of the people around you who would be hurt by your loss. It's not fair to yourself and your family.

I have no idea who it could be but if they need someone to talk to I'd be glad. Just PM me and I'll give you a call. I've lost the closest person in my life when she was only 20. I'll let you know how I dealt with it.

[Izzy]

I'm never any good in serious things, but I do know that things always get better. Like shawn-o said, the community here is fairly tightly knit, and it would be like losing a family member.

[GeezerSi]

I've known a couple of people in my life who've thought of taking their life but didn't. Enevitably, they got past that point, and later on were glad they didn't do it. Their lives got much better, and all of them were very happy with themselves later on.

Trust me... don't do it. You have a great life ahead of you.

[Toxis]

There's nothing in this world that would make me want to take my own life. I value what I have as should everyone in the world! Stress? Life is stressful. Easiest thing I can say is man up, get through it and at the end of the tunnel, you will find happiness. It's always around the bend, no matter how far that may be.

[CHRIS]

I had a family member recently attempt.

He's much better now, but it's a real reality check for both him and our family. he has even said it was the most selfish and terrible thing he has ever done. But we supported him and he knows it's not the answer anymore. It's never worth it, could you imagine if there is no after life at all? Try to enjoy the times you have here.

Death is a part of nature. it comes to everyone but should never be self inflicted. It's something we have to grow with, one of lifes many challenges but something we have to accept.

Who ever it is, i dont frown on you, but i do feel bad that you have considered this option. it should never be considered. Life is what you make it. Try to make it better for yourself. If your not happy and need to get away after past events, do so. you might need a change...a way to discover yourself and who you are inside.

Be safe...PLEASE

[twistedframe]

I don't think that there is a single user on this board that hasn't made at least one "friend" on this site. Whether or not you have actually met doesn't matter. I talk to people on here all day, who I feel as close to as I do some of the friends I hang out with in person on a regular basis. for that reason alone anyone from this forum would be missed. Hell I wonder where some people are when they haven't been on for a few hours. I would also add that nothing is so bad that you should kill yourself. Even when you lose a loved one you can move on with your life. Yeah it really really sucks for a long time, but it does get better, I know it does because I have been there more than once. I never forget about the people I love who have passed away, I think about them everyday. I think about all the fun we had, all the special moments we shared and so on. Now, a few years later I actually smile when I think about some of the things we did. It makes me happy to know that we made the most of things while we could.

I would like to say to this member that you will be missed. you would be missed by people on this site as well as people you have known for a long time in your personal life. There is always a better way to deal with things that suicide. Go to a counselor, talk to a friend do something. You would be amazed how many people would be willing to talk with you about whatever is going on in your life. Even people that don't know you.

good luck to you and I hope this thread helps out even just a little bit. You are loved and would be missed I promise.

[I Vtec, do you?]

It's always sad to hear when someone is having such a rough life that they don't even want to live anymore. Not even sure what to say on this.. just to ride it out and keep going. Things WILL get better for those who try to improve their life.

[CameronJr9]

Suicide is never the answer. Seek help. You've made the first step in telling Webby about your problems and bringing the issue to the surface. That's the true sign that you don't want to harm yourself.

Now, continue that process. I've been down and out. I've been depressed. I know darkness. But there is always light to be found. Even if you can't talk specifics, let your problems be heard by friends, family, 8thCivic, some stranger on the street, someone. Find support in church or in your hobbies or in sports you play. It's amazing the support you'll get if you just ask.

There's nothing in life you can't face with an open mind and an open heart. And you don't have to face it alone! Pain, sickness, depression, anger, fear, feelings of helplessness; these are all things we go through. Those are all things that help make the good parts of life so much better.

Good luck to you, and I hope you feel better about yourself and your situation soon.

[xtant21]

It's easy to let stress get to you...but it will get better...it will. It's tough right now for sure...but there are people that care and there are people that would drop everything to spend time with you right now if you need it. I think anybody on here would give you a call if you wanted them too...if you needed someone to talk to.

We are a close knit group here and we would definitely miss you. Look at the people that we know have been hurt...or have done something stupid and we yell at them like a family would. We all care...we're all here. Hit us up with a PM if you don't want to talk in public. Again..we're here. Don't do something regretful and foolish...the hardship right now will pass...and if you need to talk we'll listen (and/or talk).

Bottom line...we're here and we care...stick around with us...we'd miss you.

[NBPRudy]

So many good points as to why suicide is not the answer mentioned above.

It makes me sad to think that someone is even contemplating suicide.Bringing this up to webby is a good start and you need to reach out to the people who love you and who you are close to in your life.

I have to wonder if we have ever spoken on the forum in one way or another.

Please reconsider....your life is very valuable whether you believe it right now or not.

I hope this helped you at least a little and if you ever want someone to talk to I am there for you!

[07BlakBlak]

I wasnt going to but im gonna throw this in here because it seems like alot of people are confused.

If you read Webbys post, the member is struggling with stress related issues and he/she does not feel anyone would notice if he/she was missing.

He/She is not the member who has lost the loved one. That is a different member. Just pointing that out....because alot of responses are focusing on that.

[jomasoccer9]

I’ve been in this situation once being stressful, feeling lonely, and eventually attempting to comment suicide. But, I didn’t because I thought about my family, my friends, and who am I going to be in coming years from now. It’s a very difficult situation to be in and to me it’s selfish to think that I would wanna go away forever but DEEP inside I felt to stay alive in reality. I was thinking positive. Why would I do this to myself? Suicide is not the answer. LISTEN to YOURSELF. Again, think positive. Life is precious. Don’t take that away.

I hope this helps webby…