~ What women want ~

[Kakashi]

No, not the Mel Gibson movie. No i cant read your minds and do not know what it is you are thinking. And no i dont own that movie. ^~

So help me out here, im at a pretty strange point in my life, where i find that i cant understand you ladys at all. If you look at my age, you can see, im 20. Im young, i know, but i consider myself to be at least somewhat more mature than most. But i will admit, i am quite bitter for the time being.

So my question(s) is:

- What do you look for in a guy?

- Can a guy be TOO nice/generous? if so, is that a bad thing?

Note - if you decide to answer, i may ask more follow-up questions. But at any point if you feel it getting too personal, just say so.

PS- no im not ***.

[atruhondagrl]

Originally Posted by Kakashi

No, not the Mel Gibson movie. No i cant read your minds and do not know what it is you are thinking. And no i dont own that movie. ^~

So help me out here, im at a pretty strange point in my life, where i find that i cant understand you ladys at all. If you look at my age, you can see, im 20. Im young, i know, but i consider myself to be at least somewhat more mature than most. But i will admit, i am quite bitter for the time being.

So my question(s) is:

- What do you look for in a guy?

- Can a guy be TOO nice/generous? if so, is that a bad thing?

Note - if you decide to answer, i may ask more follow-up questions. But at any point if you feel it getting too personal, just say so.

PS- no im not ***.

Well, I'm 30. The type of guy I thought I wanted at 20 has changed. Back then I worried more about image and sex appeal than anything. Hell, I don't know what I was thinking back then so I'll just base this on the now.


I want a man whom I can laugh with. Someone who understands me or wants to when he doesn't. Holds doors open for me but still is aware that I can survive on my own. Treats me like a woman but has me as his best friend. Someone I share enough in common with to not be bored or lost around him but with whom I have enough not in common with to still have an air of mystery about him.

Someone handsome and not too high maintenace. A guy who can get his hands dirty but cleans up like it's a sport. Sweet and nice but with a slight naughty streak. Can debate and enjoys it and doesn't fold like tissue paper at the slightest sight of a challenge. Intelligent! I have no time for someone who makes me feel like I'm talking to a flunky.

There's a lot more I could add but I'd probably loose your attention more than I already have. As you can see the list is long. After 12 years of relationships, dating and 1 marriage I think I finally figured it out. Hope that helped a bit.

Anyway, you're 20. Go out, enjoy life. Remember that later on, dating life will be less about how good an orgasm she gives you and more about how euphoric she makes you feel in your heart in mind.

[GeezerSi]

^^ Damn! I wish I had met you earlier in life.

[Cybergypsy]

I am in my 40's and yes a guy can be too nice....if they do to much for me I feel to loved, I like a bit of a challenge...but I am always faithful.

You have to have a guy who will make you laugh.........and care for you.

[06blaksi]

Dawn, you forgot to add, someone that I can beat in a race






I also know a woman in her late 30's who has been fantasizing about younger men. Like 18. How many of you get the same way?

[LunchBoxed]

I'm not a lady and no I'm not ***, but I can tell u this from my experiences in life. YES, there is such a thing a a guy who's too nice and genreous, at younger ages (It's ok to flame me ladies of 8th). But, first let me explain myself. As you grow older women will stop taking men of generousity and kindness for granted. At younger ages (i.e.-20) ladies tend to see kind and generous men as men who will ALWAYS be there for them. Meaning it's far easier to take advantage of those men. Guys are ALWAYS nice and kind to young, attractive women (who may possibly be taken advantage of), but show their true colors once they have successfully taken the advantage. When kindness is always being thrown at you it's easy to take advantage of. I know this sounds kinda bad, but I've been that guy (taken advantage) and I've also dated that girl (been taken advantage of).

Kindness and generousity pays off with time. Hope this makes sense and helps ya out.

[Kakashi]

follow up question: is it bad to be whipped? ( not in the literal sense )

[LunchBoxed]

Some women are into the men being whipped (both figuratively and literally).

[Kakashi]

i think im starting to like the older ladys ..

my friends think im wierd.

lol!~

I think thats all the feedback ill need for now. If i ever get emo again ill know who to ask :)

Thanks again for not candy coating the truth. The truth is what i need right now. What i need next is time. Time time time .. theres a harsh mistress..

[liuh]

Originally Posted by Kakashi

i think im starting to like the older ladys ..

my friends think im wierd.

I agree, I'm 20 as well, but I think the attractive girls I'm finding are like 25+

I think it's because they are more goal-oriented, and are in the real life, or whatever, instead of the phase where girls 'just wanna have fun'

Hard to find a girl in college that's not a total bitch, especially at georgia tech where we have 70% guys. The girls know they have it good, and they won't even think twice about letting you know that =) Sigh.

THEY ARE ALL CRAZY... and i mean that in the nicest way possible!

Btw, I think when girls say they want an "athletic" guy, they mean they want someone whos ripped. lol... cause I'm not ripped, but I'm pretty sure I can beat 80% of people I meet in a lot of sports. Coordination, not muscle! =) Girl's also say they like "nice guys" but by nice guys they mean... "Yeah, you're nice and all, but I want a bad boy." LIARS!

You could say I'm a bit bitter... but I have every reason to. My (ex)GF used to come home from a frat party (drunk) (i didnt go, was playing starcraft ) and just stumble around and expected me to spend time with her. It's not like I was neglecting her, I gave her everything I had, but she obviously 'just wanted to have fun.'

End of the story is... unless you find a mature 20-21-22 year old, I think it's best to wait. CAR > GIRLFRIEND. =)

[Civicaddict79]

Originally Posted by atruhondagrl

Anyway, you're 20. Go out, enjoy life. Remember that later on, dating life will be less about how good an orgasm she gives you and more about how euphoric she makes you feel in your heart in mind.

Very wise Ms. Moderator. You definitely hit the nail on the end. And by the way, a lot of men want in women what you want in men- intelligent, funny, slightly naughty and a best friend.

[sichick]

Originally Posted by Kakashi

No, not the Mel Gibson movie. No i cant read your minds and do not know what it is you are thinking. And no i dont own that movie. ^~

So help me out here, im at a pretty strange point in my life, where i find that i cant understand you ladys at all. If you look at my age, you can see, im 20. Im young, i know, but i consider myself to be at least somewhat more mature than most. But i will admit, i am quite bitter for the time being.

So my question(s) is:

- What do you look for in a guy?

- Can a guy be TOO nice/generous? if so, is that a bad thing?

Note - if you decide to answer, i may ask more follow-up questions. But at any point if you feel it getting too personal, just say so.

PS- no im not ***.

Well everygirl looks for the whole package but theres no such thing, i personally look for persanality, some one that i click well with, dark skin (my preference), possibly similar backrounds, and that sets goals for themseleves and their future, i hate lazy guys, i like people that challange me, and thats loveing or affectionate, no cheaters please as well, has to love animals mostly someone thats matches me

as in for the too nice theres such thing as beiing too nice the word would be dont smother her but dont treat her like shit, find a middle ground

and by the way the hit it and quit it attitude is so old girls are getting to smart for that, and the others that do fall for it arent dumb there just looking for the same thing that kinda attitude just overall turns me off.

Hope this helps

[sichick]

Originally Posted by Kakashi

i think im starting to like the older ladys ..

my friends think im wierd.

lol!~

I think thats all the feedback ill need for now. If i ever get emo again ill know who to ask :)

Thanks again for not candy coating the truth. The truth is what i need right now. What i need next is time. Time time time .. theres a harsh mistress..

you starting to look for older ladies because they are more mature and have grown outta the scene i guess you can say just keep trying theres a girl out there somewhere for you

[Cybergypsy]

Originally Posted by 06blaksi

Dawn, you forgot to add, someone that I can beat in a race






I also know a woman in her late 30's who has been fantasizing about younger men. Like 18. How many of you get the same way?

thats way to young........late 20's or 30's...dont want to have to teach anyone...

[wing_gundam]

Bro you just got to relax and be yourself. You don't want to come on too strong but not too soft. Just be a nice guy (if you are?) or badass (if you're a devil) but just not a dumbass. Put the girl b4 you if you can and realise that you got to be a friend too. And don't tell her how to act, dress, or change her.

[sichick]

Originally Posted by wing_gundam

Bro you just got to relax and be yourself. You don't want to come on too strong but not too soft. Just be a nice guy (if you are?) or badass (if you're a devil) but just not a dumbass. Put the girl b4 you if you can and realise that you got to be a friend too. And don't tell her how to act, dress, or change her.

Did i forget to mention that bad boys are extreamly attractive?

[JeShUa]

I really like that movie

[firmhonda]

This thread is almost pointless.. Even if a woman claims to know what she wants (a nice guy with a good job that believes in equality), the next day thay meet a guy that meets none of those standards (think guy with crotch rocket, died and spiked blonde hair, tat of himself on his back) and loves them to death.
As far as you figuring out women, good luck bro. The best advice I have is live life for yourself and be happy when a good girl comes along. If she bails, no sweat. If she sticks around, ask yourself if you love her. If you do, then bam... end of story. If not, wash, rinse, repeat.


please remember the wash part =P

[Kakashi]

Originally Posted by firmhonda

This thread is almost pointless.. Even if a woman claims to know what she wants (a nice guy with a good job that believes in equality), the next day thay meet a guy that meets none of those standards (think guy with crotch rocket, died and spiked blonde hair, tat of himself on his back) and loves them to death.
As far as you figuring out women, good luck bro. The best advice I have is live life for yourself and be happy when a good girl comes along. If she bails, no sweat. If she sticks around, ask yourself if you love her. If you do, then bam... end of story. If not, wash, rinse, repeat.


please remember the wash part =P

i do, i do. But each time i find myself a little colder. if i keep it up at this rate by the time im 30 im going to be one hell of a asshole.

[sichick]

i have a question it might be a little weird but have you ever thought offinding someone online? i have heard pretty good results from that, its just a thought