|
|
|
10-05-2006, 04:15 PM
|
#1 (permalink) | ||
|
Smiley Whore
 
|
The Funny Thread
I'm bored and need a good laugh. please post the funniest jokes you know or read online, funny pics, e-mails, etc. feel free to post anything that's funny. anything goes...as long as it will get people
 i'll start off...please note that any jokes posted are not meant to offend anyone...if you get offended easily please do not go on any further... Susie was at Sunday school, and she was day dreaming. The teacher came up to her and asked, "Who saved us from sin?" Susie hadn't been paying attention so she didnt know. then the boy sitting behind her, Bobby, stabbed her in the butt with a pencil. Susie yelled,"GOD ALMIGHTY!" "very good" said the teacher, and went back to teaching. Susie had started day dreaming again, and the teacher went up to her and asked, "Who did God send down as our savior?" Again, Susie didn't know, and Bobby came back to the rescue, "JESUS CHRIST!" she yelled after the second stab. "Very good" and the teacher went to her desk. Susie was day dreaming agian, this time the teacher came up and asked her, "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her 29th child?" AGAIN she didn't know, and AGAIN Bobby stabbed her in the fanny with the pencil. But this time Susie blurted out, "IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME! I SWEAR I WILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!!!" The teacher fainted.
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 05:42 PM
|
#7 (permalink) | ||
|
Smiley Whore
|
haha
here's another one... what did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 05:52 PM
|
#10 (permalink) | |
|
Senior Member
|
Quote:
So a grizzly bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender... "I'll have a beer... ... ... ... ... ... ...and some pretzels. The bartender looks at him and says... "Why the big pause?" Get it, pause=paws LoL hahahaha ok i'm done. |
|
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 05:55 PM
|
#12 (permalink) | |||
|
Smiley Whore
|
Quote:
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
|||
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 06:02 PM
|
#13 (permalink) | |||
|
Smiley Whore
|
Quote:
to answer my other question since no one asked ? "What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?" he wiped his a$$...keep them coming
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
|||
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 06:35 PM
|
#14 (permalink) |
|
Senior Member
|
3 explorers on a trip through the amazon get captured by cannibals. The cannibal chief tells them that they will gut the explorers, cook them, eat them, and use their skin to make war-canoes.
The chief offers them one chance to die honorably, by their own hand, as men, and that they can choose whatever method they want. The first explorer says that he chooses to die by a sword, so they hand him a sword and he impales himself in such a way that the sword goes through him and into the cannibal standing too close behind him. The second explorer says he chooses his pistol, and asks the cannibals to retrieve it from his bag. So the cannibals take the pistol, remove all but one of the bullets, and hand it to him. He puts the gun to his head and pulls the trigger. The bullet passes through his skull, and kills 4 cannibals after going out the other side. The third man says he chooses a fork. "Unusual choice" says the chief "But your wish is granted." And they hand the 3rd explorer a fork. He immediately starts stabbing himself all over his body, and he says "f*ck your canoe!" |
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 06:52 PM
|
#15 (permalink) | ||
|
Smiley Whore
|
what was the last thing they gave elmo before he left factory?
two test tickles
__________________
Quote:
Quote:
|
||
|
|
|
|
10-05-2006, 07:09 PM
|
#16 (permalink) |
|
Senior Member
|
I got a joke but might get heat for it but here goes
A guy has been going out with his girlfriend for almost a year and thinks about doing something very special for their anniversary. He wants to get her a great gift but can't come up with anything that she would like. So he decides to get her name tattooed on himself....on his junk. He gets it done and goes home to surprise her. She see it and says "Why would you get WY tattooed on yourself?" He says give it a minute and he gets hard and it says "Wendy". She's so happy about it and they have sex all night long. A couple weeks later the guy is out at the bar and is at the urinal going to the bathroom. A Jamaican comes up next to him at the next urinal and unzips his pants and starts taking a leak. The guy looks over at the Jamaican and notices that he has a "WY" on his junk also. He says to the Jamaican, "Oh you have a girlfriend named Wendy too because of the WY on your junk." The jamaican says no and the guy is perplexed now. The Jamaican goes, The tattoo says "Welcome to Jamaica, I hope you have a nice stay" |
|
|
|
 |
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | |
|
|
Similar Threads
|
||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| The Ravishing Rally Red thread | atruhondagrl | Introduction & Pictures | 227 | 11-18-2008 10:42 PM |
| Coupes pic thread | 06RREX | Civic Coupe And Sedan | 2 | 07-07-2006 11:47 PM |
| *Vid* Bush is funny.....Bush + Andy Dick....FUNNY!!! | Prototype | Water Cooler | 4 | 02-15-2006 04:06 PM |
Linear Mode
