Great Police Quotes.................

Fixer · 10-05-2006, 10:43 AM

The following 15 Police Comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country...

#15. "Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

#14. "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

#13. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that¹s the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

#11. "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

#10. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

#9. "Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

#8. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Is Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop."

#6. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

#5. "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

#4. "Just how big were those two beers?"

#3. "In God we trust, all others we run through CPIC/NCIC."

#2. "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."

And ... THE BEST ONE!

#1 "You didn't think we gave pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't - Sign here."

**atruhondagrl** · 10-05-2006, 10:47 AM

LMAO. That was beautiful.

**CameronJr9** · 10-05-2006, 11:59 AM

Haha, nice. No clue what CPIC/NCIC is though. Criminal database?

stevenshizzle · 10-05-2006, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CameronJr9

Haha, nice. No clue what CPIC/NCIC is though. Criminal database?

Canadian Police Information Centre/National Crime Information Center

Skylinegtr06 · 10-05-2006, 02:12 PM

Theres crime in canada?

6spdChick · 10-05-2006, 03:03 PM

Steven how do you know what that stands for?

6spdChick · 10-05-2006, 03:04 PM

Oh and by the way great post lol

DSchrag · 10-05-2006, 03:35 PM

Hah... a personal favorite of mine:

"Poetry was just a way to get into young ladies pants, for me."

**2fast4u2** · 10-05-2006, 03:49 PM

hahahaha!! That's great!

"So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

tennisfan16 · 10-05-2006, 07:43 PM

that is pretty funny

FigiSi06 · 10-05-2006, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skylinegtr06

Theres crime in canada?

haha

Fixer · 10-06-2006, 01:05 PM

Think #1 is what got that cop slapped by Zsa Zsa Gabor. LOL

10-05-2006, 10:43 AM	#1 (permalink)
Fixer Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Central Ohio Posts: 628 Esteban iTrader: 0 / 0%	Great Police Quotes................. The following 15 Police Comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country... #15. "Relax; the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile." #14. "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." #13. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired." #12. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? In case you didn't know, that¹s the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun." #11. "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" #10. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?" #9. "Warning? You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket." #8. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Is Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" #7. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop." #6. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven." #5. "No, sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want." #4. "Just how big were those two beers?" #3. "In God we trust, all others we run through CPIC/NCIC." #2. "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail." And ... THE BEST ONE! #1 "You didn't think we gave pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't - Sign here."

10-05-2006, 10:47 AM	#2 (permalink)
atruhondagrl Brodie Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Near the escalator Posts: 24,181 iTrader: 23 / 100%	LMAO. That was beautiful. __________________ AWD is RWD with training wheels.

10-05-2006, 11:59 AM	#3 (permalink)
CameronJr9 Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Louisville, KY Age: 28 Posts: 26,334 Back and Forth Forever iTrader: 6 / 100%	Haha, nice. No clue what CPIC/NCIC is though. Criminal database? __________________

10-05-2006, 03:49 PM	#9 (permalink)
2fast4u2 Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 15,603 8thcivic.com member #15 iTrader: 11 / 100%	hahahaha!! That's great! "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?" __________________

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10-05-2006, 02:12 PM	#5 (permalink)
Skylinegtr06 Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Chula Vista SD Age: 18 Posts: 5,745 edwyn(male) iTrader: 1 / 100%	Theres crime in canada?

10-05-2006, 03:03 PM	#6 (permalink)
6spdChick Senior Member Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 3,528 iTrader: 1 / 100%	Steven how do you know what that stands for?

10-05-2006, 03:04 PM	#7 (permalink)
6spdChick Senior Member Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 3,528 iTrader: 1 / 100%	Oh and by the way great post lol

10-05-2006, 03:35 PM	#8 (permalink)
DSchrag Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Saratoga Springs, NY Age: 24 Posts: 524 iTrader: 0 / 0%	Hah... a personal favorite of mine: "Poetry was just a way to get into young ladies pants, for me."

10-05-2006, 07:43 PM	#10 (permalink)
tennisfan16 Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I have a cat. Age: 25 Posts: 3,740 iTrader: 3 / 100%	that is pretty funny

10-06-2006, 01:05 PM	#12 (permalink)
Fixer Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Central Ohio Posts: 628 Esteban iTrader: 0 / 0%	Think #1 is what got that cop slapped by Zsa Zsa Gabor. LOL

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